By Raffy Gutierrez
Most people think depression looks like sadness. It doesn’t. Sadness still has movement—tears, anger, words. Depression is the opposite: stillness, emptiness, silence. It’s the absence of feeling.
For me, depression has always felt like being trapped in a vacuum. You breathe, but the air feels heavy. You see the world moving, but it all looks muted. Food has no taste, music no rhythm, life no reason. You exist, but you’re not alive.
This is why so many suicides catch loved ones by surprise. The person looked fine because they learned to act fine. Many of us who are depressed master the art of performance—we smile, we post photos, we work. But behind the façade is a crushing void.
For teenagers, that void can form even faster. Social media makes it easy to look happy and impossible to admit you’re not. Every scroll is a reminder of who you’re not, what you don’t have, or where you haven’t succeeded. That silent comparison kills slowly.
Parents often mistake the signs. When their teen withdraws or stops engaging, they call it laziness. When they get irritable, it’s “hormones.” When they lose interest in everything, it’s “just a phase.” But what if it’s a cry for help?
Depression doesn’t always scream—it whispers. It hides behind humor, behind silence, behind routine. And unless you’re patient and observant, you’ll miss it completely.
I know that numbness well. There were mornings I’d stare at the ceiling, unable to move, unable to care. It wasn’t sadness—it was nothingness. The void doesn’t hurt; it erases.
If you love someone showing these signs, reach out gently. Don’t bombard them with pep talks or moral advice. Just say, “I’m here,” and mean it. You don’t have to fix them. Just keep them company in the dark until help arrives.
For those inside that darkness, remember: the void is a liar. It tells you nothing matters, but that’s not true. You matter more than you know.
Don’t isolate. Seek help. There are doctors, hotlines, and people who understand this battle because they’ve fought it too. You can climb out. You deserve to climb out.
Continued in next week’s article: The Battle Within – How Destructive Thoughts Push People to the Edge.
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Rafael “Raffy” Gutierrez is a Technology Trainer with over 25 years of experience in networking, systems design, and diverse computer technologies. He is also a popular social media blogger well-known for his real-talk, no-holds-barred outlook on religion, politics, philosophy.
